Inspired by the New Yorker’s Simon Rich and my blog hero I present “Things I imagine people saying about me when I was:”
8: “Hey why does that guy have a shirt that says ‘The Vonz’ on it?” “I think its in reference to that Happy Days guy, but his last name is Vaughan, so its kinduva play on words” “That guy’s a dork.”
12: “Why is that guy soaking wet? We’re at a mall for chrissake?” “He just fell in that fountain by the movie theater.” “He did?” “Yeah he was trying to impress some girl but accidentally fell in.” “That guy’s a dork.”
13: “That guy looks different.” “Yeah I know, something is different.” “Yeah can’t place it though.” “I got it.” “He washed his hair.” “That’s it.” “Yeah that guy’s a dork.”
15: “Look at that guy with curly hair.” “Yeah I think he just got a perm. He said he wanted to look like Kevin Cronin from REO Speedwagon.” “That guy’s a dork.”
“It's not supposed to make sense, it's supposed to make money!” -- 
